video: children see, children do

This video is absolutely moving. A great point!

video: one semester of spanish, love song

For all those spanish students out there!



-lilxerica

influence

My thoughts, actions, opinions, and state of mind are influenced by what I see and read, and are apparent in what I say, do, or write.

Post- election thoughts

Hey there!

Hmm much has happened between now and before. The fall equinox has approached and the end of daylight savings time has commenced with the turning back of our clocks one hour. Joyous moment in my mind as with the right line of thinking, this means one more hour of sleep. I always like to not turn back my clocks to "trick" myself. Sometimes it does work! Anyways, I feel a bit more energized than I normally do, which is a pleasant plus. As for issues to speak of, I am pleased and very proud to have lived to see America elect her first African American President, Barack Obama. For twenty-two months, my heart goes out to all the children of the candidates and I often wonder how they must be feeling as their parents are out on the move with great motivation to create change for theirs and our future.

Concerning, Barack's postion in the beginning stages, I was a bit skeptical. I held this pestimissism that as the democrats battled for their nomination, the republics differed in the way that John McCain breezed through to his spot as presidential cadidate. At one point with much reluctance, I thought that McCain being the most "normal" and "typical", would win. Many questions laid in my mind last year: "Is America ready to accept a black president into office? Is America ready for change? If it is, is Obama truly ready and suitable to lead?"

When I saw so much corruption in politics and in the government's ways, my answer to these questions were mainly No and perhaps, a few maybes to open up a chance to release skepticism in the coming months. This is how I felt, until the tide started to steadily rise. Stained by the media, I was convinced that Hilary was too much of a woman that wore a plastic mask of smiles under her desire to perfect and execute. Near defeat, she remained determined to continue her run with her funds and began to swirl insults to Obama. When Obama went through and became the top candidate for the democratic party, the claws sunk back in and Hilary seemed like she was trying her best to put on a even brighter mask to please her former rival in hopes to be chosen as his vice presidential running mate. Yet, these hopes were crushed once Obama announced his selection as Joe Biden, a white older male to complement Obama's composition. This choice allowed voters to be reassured that someone with a great amount of experience would be behind and support the president.

A poll once said that about 34% of Hilary's supporters would sway towards McCain if she was not chosen. In a deep attempt to draw the women voters left from Hilary, McCain surprises all at the republican convention with his choice for vice president, Mrs. Sarah Palin, governor of Alaska and experienced mother of five children.

Hah! This very woman in my belief, led McCain to his defeat. I've often thought that soon the rush will come where writers will swoom into get their books titled, The Palin Impact or The Problem with Palin and so forth. The hockey mom with a hot determination to succeed as a politician drew many in with her fiery passion to work for the people, but this bulldog with lipstick couldn't fool everyone. Mother of five... one daughter at seventeen, pregnant. Another darling one of seven years holds her dear brother of something months born with a disability. With her own pregnancy, Palin hid hers until the eighth month and delivered her son right after a speech where her water broke. She never told her children beforehand that their brother had Downs Syndrome, which is quite unfortunate. With all these facts coming in, it grew some doubt whether she was qualified. Palin loves her family dearly, and they definitely need her. Alaska may be massive compared to much of the United States, but concerning people, it's a land of barren to Chicago.

The drama grew more, when Katie Couric's interview came out with Palin. I watched the SNL version first (in which, Tina Fey is phenomenal! On foreign policy: "I can see Russia from my house!"). Then I proceeded to watch the actual interview. Whew! ... Reality just struck me there. I thought SNL completely overexaggerated the scene at first, but man, Palin was so scrambled. When asked a question she did not know, she begins to stutter and goes forth to refer back to her candidate, as if a daughter seeking her father's hand not sure what to do. After that, she attempts to answer by speaking in fragments without answering the original question and then realizing how foolish she appears, she goes about to say that she'll research more... Throughout the footage seen, it was apparent that Palin was unprepared and her pulse was racing with alarm. In response, the majority of the public begins to worry and label Palin as unfit while, fellow republicans claim in denial that Couric and the rest of the media is just picking on her.

Later on, I was sure that Palin was over when I read in "TimesWeek" that Palin had thought that the Vice President ran the Senate. Any seventh grader could have told her otherwise.

Because of the Palin choice, many strongly raised republicans had pressed the blue button for this election (this year Texas seemed split pretty well while usually they are strongly republican!). A firm belief stands that perhaps it was really Palin's fault. Hilary may have worn a mask, but at least she was well educated and qualified. If McCain were to die in office abruptly, I would be very very afraid to have Sarah Palin as president (Matt Damon would agree! I've had some people say that if they were a foreign country with out collapsing government with Palin in charge, they would take over).

On the other hand, Biden actually touched me a bit during his debate with Palin when he choked up a bit. He talked about knowing how it feels like to struggle especially when he was once a single father raising two sons after his first wife died. For a man with such a tongue like him to have gone though that, showed us great compassion, care, and strength. I used to think that if Barack has chosen Hilary after McCain chose Palin, they would make it in the hope that the American people would not look at sex and race, but on the importance of issues like the economy (both candidates during the race called Clinton for advice). If he chose Hilary before McCain's choice, McCain would obviously have chosen a Male running mate. Though it all, I have to say, if Palin had not been involved, I don't think I would have keep this many tabs on this historic election.

By now, I've sat here for quite a while now. Watching tv last night, was so moving. Even in my home, I felt like a part of what was happening. Like the tragic events of 9/11 and Katrina, I know I have witnessed them and now I have witnessed this; something hopeful for all. I cannot go on and say that yes, this is the most positive stepping stone of American history quite yet as there is so much more to come. Obama's victory speech was spoken with what is described as grim determination. It'll be tough and scary, but after four years, we shall see where we as a country stand and evaluate the progress.

Obama's quote yesterday really stuck out to me: "There are not red states in American, there are not blue states in American, there is only The United States of America". With this, no matter whether you are Republican or a Democrat, let us agree that this is history! Martin Luther King said many years ago, "We shall overcome!" in his famous speech and like call and response, Obama and his supporters chant back, "Yes, We Can."

-lilxerica

older poetry: golden loom

GOLDEN LOOM
threads fall across the structure
weave on by
precious memories sewn
into the indents of my mind
the loom holds tight
through the battle of time
but breaks after a single thread
is removed from the wood
and stands alone
without the others
it is nothing
but taking the crystalline needle
it is sewn back in
into the golden loom
and reuniting with the others
in unison.

(-1.30.08)

-lilxerica

blurb: cabs/taxis

Just took my first cab yesterday.

I was really hesitant at first since I watch too much TV where passengers are always kidnapped and stuff like that. Since this particular company paid by the meter, it was super expensive. It was $2 per mile and whenever we stopped, it still felt like it just kept ticking... By the end of the ride, I can say that a lot of taxi drivers are just plain creepy and are making a lot of money too.

NEVER AGAIN WILL I RIDE A TAXI IN THE NEAR FUTURE
(if I don't want to go broke. end of story)!

-lilxerica

Sorry!

Rawr!

Sorry for not posting in a while.
Sadly due to so much work, I'm not sure I'll be meeting my posting quota for each month;
however, my thoughts keep going and will return soon once everything's settled.
Check out my Flickr for picture updates!
They'll always keep coming!

Love,
-lilxerica

interesting: daemon

random quote: creativity and art

“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes.

Art is knowing which ones to keep.”

-Scott Adams

Game: Patapon!

PATA - PATA - PATA - PON!

From the people who made Loco Roco comes PATAPON! A must-have for the PSP at only $20, nothing can go wrong! The game play in this particular game is original and one of a kind while you the gamer play as the god of the little creatures called the patapons. Your goal is to lead them to glory with the use of a magical drum in which you keep track of their rhythm through a call/response system. I played this game for a while and its pretty tough to follow, but oh so very addicting!



-lilxerica

random quote: wanting

"We fear the thing
we want the most."

Random: HELLO HAREEM!

Okay, so this post is dedicated to umm... Hareem!
Please continue to read all my very odd posts. :D

Game: Loco Roco

Hello!

Welcome August!

Below, I've thought to mention a pretty unique game for the PSP. I personally, don't own one nor have I actually played the cute-looking game, but have thought it appropiate to give you a peek and recommend this intiguing people-friendly game. It's pretty old as it has been out on the market for quite a while, but the happiness it spreads lives on. It's pretty random really with a bunch of blobs rolling around the place to make bigger blobs. So addicting to watch, and the music is just obnoxious! Gotta Love Weird Japanese Games... ;)

-lilxerica

thought: the state of humanity during the holocaust

The Highlight of Human Emotion During Tragedy

The best and worst of people usually emerge during times of grief, desperation, and sadness. Many may wonder as to why such extremes are not expressed during the light-hearted and joyous moments of life. It is simply because, during those times of pleasure, one emotion is emitted by all or rather a façade is put up to simulate such elatedness, while dismissing the unhappy works that threaten the laughter and excitement. Tragedy however, as awful as it seems, gives opportunity for all to display a range of emotions from hate to even compassion or sympathy. One such example would be that of the Holocaust occurring prior to and during World War II.

Sickening and cruel events happened during the Holocaust involving Jews, gypsies, and peoples of difference ironically all alike, being mindlessly slaughtered without any consideration that those individuals were most positively human too. Perhaps many may argue that those men, the Nazis were not at all human for their unforgivable actions, but some must fathom that yes, indeed that those in that political group were very much human showing sadly the worst in humanity. Dr. Josef Mengele, also known as the “Angel of Death”, was a member of the Nazi party and served as chief provider of the gas chambers located at the death camp of Auschwitz. While not directing the traffic and ushering lines of women and children to their deaths, he spent a lot of his time performing repulsive experiments dealing with twins, genetics and basically testing the limits of “science” with nature. He would forcefully drop foreign chemicals into the eyes of men with the intention of changing eye color, but instead inflict burning pain to his victims. In addition to the nauseating acts of Mengele, it is said that the worst that one may do during difficult times is simply and painfully, nothing. Over six million were slaughtered in the plain sight of the world. Only the world could have sadly allowed this at the time.

On the contrary, the brighter side of the picture is that many did not plainly stand and do “nothing.” During the Holocaust, it has been recorded that many individuals had made the choice to rise up and fight back against anti-Semitism and hatred by either joining a rebellion or subtly and surreptitiously allowing Jews and people of difference to hide within their homes. Irene Sendler worked as a Polish social worker during the Holocaust and “helped save some 2,500 Jewish children from the Nazis by smuggling them out of the Warsaw Ghetto and giving them false identities” (Associated Press). Although, Sendler had given the Jewish children false names and passed them as Catholics, she took great care into writing the original birth-given names of each child in hope to reunite them with their families after the war. One child who was saved by Sendler wrote, "Mrs. Sendler saved not only us, but also our children and grandchildren and the generations to come." Sendler, who died recently almost three months ago at 98 displayed the good of humanity at its peak saving thousands of lives and with time, the numbers keep growing.

Altogether, through the horrific events of one of the most devastating periods of history, there was a definite existence of evil intentions yet simultaneously the presence of the underlying goodness of the merciful. The Holocaust is taught today, teaching lessons around the world to realize the terror, yet sensitive heart of humanity. ♫

-lilxerica

thought: some sad, but funny pics?

A cow, a chick, and an orange.

Yeah, so today I was browsing around the internet and I came across three pictures that pertain to the usage of animals (or fruit in the orange's case) to create beneficial human products like our food. I showed all three to my mom, and in turn, she though only one of them was just gosh awful sad. It happens to be the tiny cow one... Hmm I wonder why, because isn't the chick an animal too? Why particularly the cow? Maybe it's because the cow depicted in the picture looks so cute, that it breaks your heart to see it cry...












(Of all of them though, she loved the chicken one haha.)

-lilxerica

thought: taste of chicago

TASTE OF CHICAGO TODAY
JULY 5th

Whew! What a busy day today. This morning (which would be yesterday morning I suppose), my family and I took the train down to Chicago to the crazy food fest. All week I had been super anxious to go with my sister and dad. It's always a thrill to see what's new especially it's been a long time since the last time I went years ago. Armed with my camera and pleased with the sunny skies, we arrive. At the Taste, so many stalls of all kinds of food were available for hungry people to trade in tickets to munch on each rare delicacy ranging from sauteed goat, bits of shark to the infamous turkey leg. There's so much to say and tell about my experience, but I'm incredibly tired at the moment, but I'll give you a sneak peek at some pics of that ever-so-tempting food:

Watch out for an update sometime!
(Again, eventually those yummy pics will go onto flickr...)

-lilxerica

event: update of fireworks

Hey all! This is just an update of the Fourth of July festivities. At noon, I marched in the community parade as well as watched a portion of it with a volunteer group I'm a part of. It was pretty exciting with the turn out of so many people stationed in lawn chairs down the street curbs. Later for lunch, we went out to the local pizzeria and feast on a warm bunch of slices. At home, I was increasingly pleased to find my dad's beautiful chicken satay waiting for me to snack on. I chilled for a while to rest up those drained feet, called up a friend and relaxed for a bit. At night, my family and I went out to see the fantastic works of fire (that's fireworks guys). I set out a light and cheap tripod to get some pics of the blasts. I think it was pretty successful. Later this week, I'll be posting some of them onto my flickr, but now you can just gaze deeply into the one of the previous post and this one or amuse yourself with some of the videos I took (horrible grainy quality, but it works! after all, it is a digital camera meant for pictures). Enjoy!

-lilxerica

event: independence day!

hey for all the proud americans:

Happy Independence Day!

have an amazing forth
cheer the parades
munch on barbecue
and most of all remember
catch those fireworks wherever you are!

-lilxerica

random quote: proverbs

“A hope deferred makes the heart sick,

a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.”

-Proverbs 13:12

thought: descent of humanity

Questioning our ultimate future.

As years go by, could it be that we are ravishingly taking a sweet lush bite of the forbidden fruit? That like Adam and Eve, we are extracting knowledge beyond power we are capable of harnessing? But if we are like the former residents of Eden, where is our own garden of majesty and perfection to regret for?

With the rise of knowledge, our own ignorance and innocence is at a decline; therefore at the world's eventual end, who else do we have to blame but ourselves?

Flourish and fall, like the once grand empire of Rome, I wonder with a heavy heart;
what is our outcome to be?

-lilxerica

video to share: im your's

Thought I'd want to share this particular video. It's a music video showing two people that run their life in the same way, and eventually as fate has it, they meet. It was made by the couple's friend and presented to them on their wedding day. Very cute!

poetry: bud

One blooms.
The others watch,
waiting to soon break out of the bud
and come to life with blossom.





-lilxerica

random quote: live. and live well.

" Live. And Live Well.

BREATHE. Breathe in and Breathe deeply.

Be PRESENT. Do
not be past. Do not be future. Be now.

On a crystal clear, breezy 70 degree day,
roll down the windows and

FEEL the wind against your skin. Feel the warmth of
the sun.

If you run, then allow those first few breaths on a cool Autumn day to

FREEZE your lungs and do not just be alarmed, be ALIVE.

Get knee-deep in a novel
and LOSE track of time.

If you bike, pedal HARDER and if you crash then crash
well.

Feel the SATISFACTION of a job well done-a paper well-written, a project
thoroughly completed, a play well-performed.

If you must wipe the snot from your
3-year old's nose, don't be disgusted if the Kleenex didn't catch it all

because soon he'll be wiping his own.

If you've recently experienced loss, then
GRIEVE. And Grieve well.

At the table with friends and family, LAUGH.

If you're
eating and laughing at the same time, then might as well laugh until you puke.

And if you eat, then SMELL.

The aromas are not impediments to your day. Steak on
the grill, coffee beans freshly ground, cookies in the oven.

And TASTE.

Taste every ounce of flavor.

Taste every ounce of friendship.

Taste every ounce of Life.

Because-it-is-most-definitely-a-Gift."


- Kyle Lake, "Sermon"

thought: what if stop signs were blue?

What if stop signs were BLUE?

Then I'm sure car accident death rates would soar even higher...

event: memorial day

Memorial Day










Remember the willpower

strength and perseverence
some went through

Remember the struggle

fight strain and pain
some endured

Remember the skill

strategy and intelligence
some held

Remember the quiet

hopeful wait
some were forced to feel

Remember their acts of heroism

passion and longing
some had

Remember the price

in which we pay for
the battles won
and battles lost

Remember the tears

of joy and sadness

that poured down those cheeks

in search of a tint or maybe a pint more of a filling of
hope.

Remember the lost.

Think of the Forgotten.

Reminsce the Rememberance.

-lilxerica

assignment: NEANDERTHRAL MAN

A Day In The Life of A Neanderthal

The sun’s rays seethe into our cave to tell the story of a new day. Lashing her whip of light she tugs onto my leg and pulls me awake from my slumber. Groaning in a language indistinguishable even to my companions, I reluctantly pull myself from the deep stone beneath me that has steadily begun to warm up at morning’s sight. As I step toward the ground beyond the shelter, a cold breeze rushes in and brushes against my own shoulder. I do not shiver. The cold is something my people have grown accustomed to in our tribe.

It’s not a very large group at all. There have been rumors of the existence of others just like us, but somehow different in a peculiar way; more flawed and weak compared to our massive and strong build of perfection. I pity them, yet myself at the same time. I’ve known the men I stand with for all my life, but still an unsettling spark of curiosity surges through my veins in search of an escape or refuge for paradise from this loathsome and lonely isolation I’m selfish to feel. What lies beyond the mellow line cast by the milky sun during sunset? I can neither express myself nor cry out in anguish to my people. They would never understand, yet I must follow what has been set before me. I close my eyes and sigh as wisps of more air pass through the nape of my neck luring me out of the dark.

By now, the others have awoken as well and now cluster close together. Normally, we would have all gone out to the wilderness to hunt, but someone has passed, a young male while wrestling a beast. It is a great shame. I look up above, shielding my eyes from the sun and see a flock of feathered birds flapping their wings in unison, almost as if they are beckoning me to pierce them with stone into their very hearts. I shake off this fantasy and see that already women have begun to gather tiny flowers from nearby bushes, while the men start to dig with ambition for a deep trench. Minutes pass as I stand back and watch as the ground begins to melt away. Blinking once more, I hurry along to join them tossing dirt around incoherently across the surrounding surface.

Hours later, we manage to utilize our stone tools, each handcrafted well and begin our hunt. Finally once the stars have emerged, it is pronounced night. The deceased has been put to rest with small yellow petals and flowers adorning the burial site. I am pleased. The soft consistent breeze continues. Children play music from bones flutes, handcrafted the same as the stone from their fathers and dance around the fire spluttering noises I do not know. The sound is soothing to my ears, while the atmosphere remains calm. I roast my prize bird in peace, plucking the feathers off my weapon and wiping it clean. Women present other plants as well to accompany the bird. Content as I am, there exists still that yearning for something more. An expression perhaps that remains undiscovered. ◊

random quote: shadows

"Never fear
shadows.

They simply mean
there is a light shining
somewhere nearby."

thought: trip to forest preserve

Today, we went to a local forest preserve in attempt to test the water quality of the streams, and photograph various types of creatures in biology class. Overall, beside some mishaps that occurred here and there with crazy hippies exuberant and hyper to return to the wild (well actually only one), the trip was a success. I was able to snag pretty decent shots of tiny macro organisms that I never knew that was there within the soil I stood on.

The pluses of today:

• Got more pictures of different species, including:
• various arthropods
• Earth worm
• some sort of fly
• slug/snail creature
• crawfish
  
• new strange fungi
• orange poisonous-looking one
• big flappy fungus
• many other weird looking varieties growing on the trees
• portraits (well, not really different species...)
• with very pretty natural lighting!
• it didn't rain
• I wore my hiking boots that protected me much more than any pair of gym shoes could from the mud.
  
• the forest preserve seemed much nicer than others
• opener area
• enables one to get a feel for nature
• relaxing
• vibrant in color
  
• stressed to be observant
  
• ate lunch in a comfortable place by the stream
• had a korean wing
  
• adventurous
• saw a deer and raccoon from a distance
  
• found a quarter on the floor
• kicked up a crawfish in the stream that was preggers and was laying black little eggs on my hand (but it crawled off and plopped back into the water)

The laughing tears of today:

• field trip = more work to do later on
• MUD, gets everything dirty and sucks feet up
• when you pick up feet, makes slurrgyy sound
  
• attempted to cross stream with one arm while on a log (with boots slippery by the way)
• clipboard with papers and friend's binder falls into water
• clipboard face down, binder...floating
  
• got into water with useless weighters
• water caved in
• socks got slogggy
• left cell phone in pocket while in water
• still works, which is good
• threw it at friend on land
  
• getting out = difficult
• mud slide present
• pulled me out, but weighters came off
• weighters still attached to my belt, dragging me down
• get through with iggy socks
• pour out gallons of water in weighters
• sprained or something part of my foot weirdly
  
• hopped around with iggy socks
  
• felt like I still was wearing weighter even on land (drenched jeans blehgsss)

Yeah yep. Memories. Sorry for my blabbering. Just wanted to write it down somewhere.
Though the day has its interesting humps/ bumps I had fun times haha,
even when a little messy.

-lilxerica

event: mother's day!

Ello! I'm not sure if I can manage to make my monthly quota of posts (haha), but here's something quick and easy to shout out:

Happy Mother's Day!

Take the time sometime to today (if not already) and say some meaningful words of appreciation towards your mom. Many of us don't realize how much our mothers have impacted our lives and how much they do whether it be emotionally or just simply cleaning your room, doing laundry, or cooking a mouth-watering meal. Things start to change however, when Mom's not there. The bed remains undone, the bathroom's mirrors are opaque, and you cry in the corner each night wishing for her to return home. Boohoo. So get up and give your mom a big hug and thank her for everything she's done!

-lilxerica

PS- Don't let this secular holiday creep up on you next year. Buy gifts and what-nots way ahead of time. Last minute gifts are basically crap. Take the time and put some thought in what you spend your buck on. She'll love it and you'll be proud too.

old post: response to "night"

Description was in response to the holocaust book, "Night" by Elie Wiesel. Please pardon any grammatical mistakes as this was written last year.


"Lost with No Sight.

As Night draws to a close with its powerful yet simplistic ending, Elie suffers the loss of his father, the link to the past. Attached is a photograph taken recently.
Elie represents the girl crossing the street. There are many dangers and precautions before crossing, such as the factors of hunger and keeping his stamina up. The girl wears white. White is the color of innocence, and so in this picture her clothes symbolize the purity of the Jews, that they had done no wrong. The girl appears lost, as Elie is lifeless with no sight of hope.
As you look a bit farther, note the approaching car. It brings danger. We know the driver’s intention that he wants to reach the other side and keep going along the street, planning to achieve this as quickly as possible. This is similar to the German’s goal of genocide. They wish to reach their main objective as quick and efficiently as possible and therefore ignore those standing in their way by running over them.
As car accidents occur each day, all the victim is able to see is a flash of a blinking life and it’s all over. Of course, the killings of the Jews were not accidents, but the Nazis do send out a blinking alert of their arrival with the hushed rumors among the citizens of towns. In the beginning, Moshe the Beadle was that light for the Hungarian town where Elie came from. He blinked, blared out words repeatedly, but no one took head of this and zoom, those who did not run, vanished.
However in the photo, notice that the girl is looking towards the car as she is caught by the illumination of the lights. Elie unlike the others in the beginning believe Moshe the most, yet still like the girl has not taken action and moved to safety. Also near the end, Elie is at his limits when his father dies and described that everything after could not touch him anymore.
All around are the deep dark trees that hover over the scene. This is the darkness that waits patiently and are his thoughts of continuing with the evil surrounding him. There is only one tree different from the rest; the birch tree, white one. That one represents Elie’s most personal inner thoughts, such as the one of survival, referring to the block leader’s advice. In one scene the block leader, advised Elie to not give his father his ration but eat it himself for he had more potential to live as it was every man for himself in this situation. Morally, Elie refused to do this for he could not bear to part with his father or “betray” him in any way, but he knew the right decision.
“He was right, I thought in the most secret region of my heart, but I dared not to admit it.”
Finally, the sky appears glowing. The sun is the prisoner’s ray of hope, but often the clouds cover up this hope. Yet somehow, the sky will clear or that hope, sunray will shine through as Night concludes."

----5/8/07

--------------------------------

Also if anyone is curious, the actual picture was taken of my former friend crossing the street in such an odd way...

-lilxerica

older poetry: tennis team :)

Tennis Team :)

Tennis for me
and for you
I have two rackets
and other equipment too
Won't you play
on this sunny day
or sit around
and loathe til noon
Remember it's
only Tennis for me
and for you.

-summer '07

-lilxerica

random quote: tears

"Tears are words
the heart cannot express."

random poetry: peaches

Peaches
are amazing.
Sweet in taste.
Perfect,
tended in the cold.
Stories inspired
by their appearance.
fuzzy, round and smooth.
James feasted on them.*
Girls bounded with them.**
The scent is pleasant in the air.
Fresh,
delightful, and
new,
peaches are superior to any fruit.

-lilxerica

*"James and the Giant Peach"
**"Peaches" and "The Secret of Peaches"

older poetry: love's definition

define love for me please.

love is hard to understand perfectly

love is hard to know thoroughly


love is unbearable to lose


love is trickling to my skin


love is feeling emotion undescrible


love is the blush on my face

love is the laughter from our mouths


love is-

you.

7/26/06

-lilxerica

event: april fool's

Happy April Fool's Day!

Through all the jokes and pranks pulled out today on this quite odd holiday (I'm not even sure if you would call it one. It's not at all secular.), there is one that stands out the most. One of my teachers told us one in particular that he pulled on his wife years ago, but still gives a fresh laugh each time he recalls the prank. It's the one about oreos, everyone's favorite milk dunker cookie. You basically carefully open the cookie ends and carefully replace the vanilla icing with baking soda toothpaste. After doing this to his wife, the couple teamed up together and prepared a whole new batch of "oreos" for a group of friends they invited over one day. I remember him enthusiastically telling us about he and his wife woulf pick up the normal oreo cookies from the bottom of the cookie platter, and offer their visitors the others. When they took a cookie, I could just imagine my teacher and his wife feigning to be nonchalant, but secretly anticipating the wild look of their victims. Mmmm quite amusing to hear and imagine the results. Just a warning though, only play this prank on people you know well that can take a joke with good humor or you'll have one less of a friend and a bunch of oreos thrown at ya. ;D

Sit tight for possibly a batch of fluorine filled oreos next year!

-lilxerica

plushies: The Mochi Pattern

Hello there! Even though I often find myself tied up with ugly work to do that needs, but hopefully gets done, I do find many crafts and projects that do amuse me so. For example: Plushie making! :D It's all pretty new to me, but the concept of making your own stuffed what-nots is brilliant. Saves money, not necessarily time though, but I believe it's worth it to create something you can be proud of.

Try the pattern below from cherrymix.com!

Oh yeah, the right is my first finished product or rather an attempt of the fabulous plushie mochi. Unfortunately, I accidently made one of the patterns the wrong size and bam! I got a wonderfully deformed squishy ball. Even though it's not perfect. I drew a face and he's now the perfect stress ball!
-lilxerica

random quote: size of dreams

"DREAM NO SMALL DREAMS

FOR THEY HAVE NO POWER TO

MOVE THE HEARTS OF MEN."

(aka. Always dream BIG!)

event: easter-ness

I usually don't post twice a day, but I forgot to mention the festivities of today, though Easter is not usually in March... and so,

Happy Easter Sunday!

Let us reflect back and remember what Christ has done and is doing in our lives.

Remember:

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life."

-John 3:16

He has risen!
He has risen, indeed.

-lilxerica

poetry: who i am

I'm Lilxerica.

I like photography,
I enjoy taking pictures,
but I'm no expert photographer.

I appreciate music,
I listen to a variety of genres,
but I'm far from a musician.

I can pick up a pencil,
I am able to manipulate paper,
but I'm definitely not a Picasso.

I leap out of joy to visit the foreign,
I'm always anxious to taste new ethnic foods,
but sadly, I'm not a money tree.

I smell the mouthwatering aromas
from the kitchen,
And I can heat, stir-fry, and boil,
but maybe someday, not now though,
I'll cook like my mom or dad.

However,
I may not be a lot of amazing talented things,
but I think, believe, and wait-
actually know
that I am me.

-lilxerica

random quote: something to dance for

“We dance for laughter,
we dance for tears,
we dance for madness,
we dance for fears,
we dance for hopes,
we dance for screams,
we are the dancers,
we create the dreams.”

-anonymous

-lilxerica

march: of the supposed lions and sheep

Blurb of the Weather

With a comfortable leap day behind us, a new March is here.
In primary school, I was taught that the weather at the beginning of March was like that of a lion, with pure craziness and ended like a lamb into April. Funny enough, the rhyme for April deals with showers... Anyways, so far (it's only been two days into the month) I feel that the weather hasn't been hectic as the old saying claims. In fact, the weather in February was one of the most oddest I can recall with a mixture of rare warm, storming snow, slippery ice, and even a frosty rain. I awoke today stepping out the door in March, with pleasant 50 degree weather and despite the leftover dirty slushy snow of February, I could feel that taste of spring possibly upon us. However, I can't say that yet, that ground hog ritual has not yet begun...

Let's just hope the weather won't be as spontaneous as our recent February!

-lilxerica

random quote: risking and love

“To love is to risk
not being loved in return.
To hope is to risk pain.
To try is to risk failure,
but risk must be taken
because the greatest hazard in life is to
risk nothing.”

through our eyes

What do you see?


Green Eye: Green, surrounded by a misty blue and gold ring. Like the murky ocean.

Brown Eye: Brown, pure and simple. Designs like ancient Greek pottery, cracking.

Blue Eye: Blue, so deep and full of mystery. The patterns are wisps like nymphs that are dancing ever so gracefully.


-lilxerica

opening the door

Opening the Door

Story of reminiscence between a boy and his struggle to accept his friend’s health condition

For hours, nature continued with her dance. The seventh brick house on the old avenue was empty with the exception of my presence. The rain came down and intensified with the thunderous beating of the Lord’s drum. Palms against the walls of the butterscotch painted hallways; I closed my eyes tolerating each ripple felt through the plaster. I would show no fear. Yet with each stroke of the heavy weight, my heart felt distilled and jumped two beats. I wandered through the house and with each step, I heard the wooden planks creak at my every movement. Remnants of the light from God’s own show, flashed across my face as I shuffled on forward. Passing each room, I peered in and each was beautifully painted with pastels and lightly glazed. Then, I held my breath as I crept past her door and wondered what it’d be like, if I could breathe no more. Pausing, I paced back and slipped through into her haven.

The lavender interior blew me away with her satin spread sheets folded gently across her soft down bed. It was like, nothing had ever changed.

My brave girl through all the pain, how could you do it?

How could you not ever fear?

You may not be here, but my admiration for you will never disappear. From there, I let my mind wander from the present of eternal rain to the past, where my brave girl existed.

I first met Aella, three years ago during a rather oddly cool summer. I remember clearly her bright green eyes that shined like emeralds captivating your line of sight within moments. I know, three years doesn’t seem like very long time, but it’s incredible on how once you’ve become involve with someone you love, it’s impossible to escape or leave them.

At the time, I was a pretty bland kid. My head of straight dark brown hair begged for a cut, but I resisted its pleas as I simply loved the amusement of flipping it back, feeling the texture of the strands in between my fingers as I moved it from my face. I did this routine whenever I had a chance. One day at the park, she caught me doing this obsessive ritual. From the swings, Aella jumped with a spring with no hesitation and approached me. She dove in near my face gave me a prying odd look like that of a child filled with curiosity. I slowly looked up and the color of my cheeks drained from utter embarrassment. Yet still, her expression did not change. Her smile soon became contagious. In return, I gave a wry smile and turned away. When I got home, all I could think about was the strange girl’s magnetic gaze.

Each day, I returned to the park and saw her cheerfully swinging on the same rusty chained swing with her radiant brunette curls bouncing about. It seemed like Time didn’t care for her. It was as if he missed her and stalked others as she continued her activities with youthful joy.

Eventually, I did get to know Aella the first summer. She was my irreplaceable gift. Her enthusiastic cheer and encouragement keep our morality up even when the summer came to a closure. We vowed to keep in touch as any other pair of friends should during the year.

Each week, I received long handwritten letters printed on rather festive lavender stationary and in return, I replied with much anticipation for another letter. By then, autumn had past and an early winter began to surface. With the coming of barren fields, Aella’s letters transformed from those worthy of novels to simple notes made without heart that came fewer than once a month. Still, despite these signs, I waited for another. When it came to a point that Aella’s letters had stopped altogether, I became concerned slumping into a deep depression yearning for summer to wake from the frozen cold.

Fortunately, Aella appeared that summer. Except as I reached out to greet her, she was not the same. Her innocence and genuine joy seemed degraded and Aella’s youth seemed to not mature but grow old. That evening, the stars twinkled brilliantly. My eyes began to water hearing her speak of her year as they reminded me of her emerald eyes. Then, she began to mumble and eventually fell silent. I held my head up and made eye contact and she resumed with more volume.

“I’m sorry, that I hadn’t been writing,” Aella swallowed and forced a smile to continue. “As the Lord has it, I’m dying.”

I thought she was kidding. I honestly did, but then I realized that I wasn’t thinking about it. I knew she was telling the truth. I only wanted to believe otherwise and live in denial.

“Say something,” Aella pleaded with concern. Honestly, I couldn’t.

How could she be this strong?

I instead pierced my lips and hugged her firmly, never wanting to let go. Then, I did.

From then on, Aella never really did discuss her condition after her confession and we carried on living with no boundaries. At sunset, I gathered up the courage to ask.

“Are you afraid Aella?”

“Of what?” she replied with a smile.

“You know… dying?” I whispered. “Fearing death as it comes closer?” I waited for a reply and to my astonishment, Aella chuckled and shook her head.

“I must be weird,” Aella twisted a shiny brown curl from her hair as she spoke, “but no, I’m not. At first, I knew for certain that I felt Fear in my presence, but odd enough Fear never latches onto me like Death can.” I shed a tear and nodded as the second summer faded away. From the corner of my eye, I sensed Aella starting to fade just as fast, but it was only my harsh imagination.

By the third and final year, we no longer met at the park, but instead at the same spot I stood now; her lavender coated room. Each morning, I would walk down the old avenue to greet her. Often, I sat beside her bed as we talked about life. I wish some days that I could be stronger and have acceptance for her fate like she did, but I couldn’t and felt ashamed for that.

As her days became numbered I watched painfully as her radiant brunette locks that I had once admired grew dull and disappeared. Sometimes, it felt like I could feel her pain as she could mine. To heal our emotional wounds, Aella would write poetry serenading the wonders of life.

One day, Aella handed me a poem to read. I gazed at it long as it was not like any of her previous ones.

Life shouldn’t be wasted.

But it shall be spared.

Life is fragile

yet bond with great care.

When Death approaches

He craves the fear

Seeks for sadness

And your desperate, needy despair

Life with grace

Crosses Death’s Race

Mingles with His

Many sadistic mind games

Then She collapses

Under no ones control

She took the risks

Fire with fire

And now

Life is Your Only Desire

Strolling on Death Row

Sit, you weep.

Lord hath no mercy?

Each tear come down

Sun rises at dawn

Death flees

Life’s beauty seeps

Into your untainted and pure skin

Unfortunately

Death is found still,

Knocking on Her Door

And won’t flee no more.

“Will you do me a favor?” Aella whispered. Her words were soft.

“Anything,” I responded.

“When Death is there,” she pointed to her mahogany wooden door frame, “please let him in.” I didn’t respond. Aella held my hand and sighed, before she was thrown into a merciless coughing fit. Swiftly, I grabbed a glass of water and patted her frail back lightly. Not wanting to count anymore days, I finally understood Aella’s wish.

During the last night, I embraced Aella with full arms and listened closely to her instruction.

“Tonight’s the night.” I drew my eyes onto her face and saw her childish gleam with her brilliant emerald eyes sparkling like just as they were when I first met her. With that, I laid Aella comfortably there within her satin lavender sheets and stepped three paces to the door and let him in.

By now, the rain had settled to only a shower. Mother Nature’s movement had ended, but my tears still danced, longing for a finale. Reaching into my coat pocket, I grasped Aella’s poem that had absorbed my sorrow and laid it upon her bed. With that, I left my brave girl’s haven, leaving the mahogany door open. ♫

-(11/10/08)

-lilxerica